The deep conundrum

Once again I am apologizing for my lack of posting with any semblance of regularity. To that end I’m pretty sure the word hanging me up is ‘deep.’ Cause here’s the thing, I write like I breathe- all the time. Usually it’s journaling and while it’s not quite : ‘had two eggs for breakfast’ I can get pretty whiny. 

No offense if you’re into that and if so may I suggest Madly, Deeply the diaries of Alan Rickman, but it’s not my thing. My thing is reading to escape and I’ve been doing a LOT of that lately. 


So when I go to write something recently I find myself unable to wrap it up with any sort of ‘point.’ Or maybe there are points I just don’t want to make them and am in denial about them. 


It’s the middle, you see, like the middle of a really long and dark tunnel that I feel stuck in. It’s hard to go deep when you’re stuck in the middle. 


Perhaps it requires a change in thinking about what is ‘deep.’ Perhaps, deep can be a myriad of things. 


At any rate I’m a bit dismayed at how badly I have neglected my blog. So I’m going to try and turn some of my journaling time into outward journaling and put it on here. I’m also going to try and not be such a snob about content. Now, I still refuse to post recipes- because I swear to all that is holy I just want to be able to google ‘sugar cookie recipe’ and not have to read a page about someone’s grams- but I might not appoint myself your personal priest and insist on every post being this spectacular sermon about whatever inane drivel is in my head at the moment. 


So, dear reader, you’ve been warned. Oh but I do plan on writing more of all kinds so I may get creative and put some of the current works in progress on here as well. 

Happy reading! 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Darkness deep

I never knew that being deep could be a bad thing. I assumed that the opposite- being shallow- was the bad thing.  But then again, I suppose that hell is quite deep down somewhere in this realm or some other. And in the deep it can be very dark. Our former pastor is starting a bible study on Job and encouraged us to read through it.    So I dutifully started and there I found it: Job 12:22 ‘He reveals the deep things of darkness and brings utter darkness into the light.’ This is a verse I could just sit in for like five years. I tend to tunnel down into things, thinking that is where the gold is, but is it possible it is just where the dark is? I have this theory that God is so massive and complex that our whole stinking lives can be spent just exploring him. My hope is this space is my offshoot of thoughts from my own exploration of that. I’m not sure I can promise to be regular with posting, but I set up a link to subscribe which should be on left side (or in a drop dow...
Read more

Gone through

I realize that probably half of my posts are apologizing for having abandoned this poor blog. This time it was from a medical thing that just dragged and dragged. I finally came through it. But. Man was it a struggle. I won’t put a lot of details cause quite frankly it was not pleasant and required I spend a lot of time in the bathroom. No one wants to read that crap. Literally.  Including, me. But. When you are in something, in the thick of it and it’s like you are suddenly in ‘Honey a Shrunk the Kids’ and everything is a forrest to you even though in actuality it’s just a blade of grass, well, all you can do really is go through it. It helps if some kind souls who have some bit of understanding to your situation come alongside you. I am blessed on that score and don’t deserve the friends and family that I have.  If you are just now hearing of this - I’m sorry. At some point I kind of just shut down trying to reach out and keep folks informed and there was not a clear line re...
Read more

The women who came before

She stares at me, fiercely, every day at work.  She ran the War Office of Tennessee.  Truth be told, she was a ‘Rosie the Riveter’ but. She stayed. Her best friend and her decided now that They had made it into the workforce, they weren’t going home. I stare at that tiny woman with a BOSS face, And I am steeled for my next meeting. She was my grandmother. She was a professor at UT and now retired. No. Scratch that. She just died. And I’m still painfully reminded Because I honestly, weirdly, thought she would live forever. Her scientist background convinced me that she would tick Right past the nineties and live well into the hundreds.  So many ‘remedies’ for this and that, God love her, it mostly worked. I want to live to 90-something. She was my friend, and I miss her already. She was mother, she is sister, she is daughter, she is friend. She flies. She fights. She is fierce. And because she flew the heights  And fought the fights And fiercely did what used to only ...
Read more