Something blue, something new

 I am sorry it has been a while. It’s been a busy time, and this month much of my ‘writing’ time will be spent on Nanowrimo. I’m still debating if I will post any of my stories or not. My concern is that while I am great at starting new projects I am not so great at finishing them. And I think that it would be somewhat frustrating to start a serial novel or something and then just have it end. Sort of like in the ‘90s or the ‘00s when a great TV show just got canceled mid-season and you were left screaming into the void. 

I’m getting sidetracked. My point with this rambling is that I feel like I am finally coming out of a hole. Or a cave, let’s go with a cave. I was hunkered down for a storm, and it lasted far longer than I thought it would, but suddenly the sun broke through and out I stagger blinking in the fresh and whole light like a brand new person. Maybe these moments happen for us far more often if we would just allow them. 

My something ‘blue’ lately has been my career choice. It has been, difficult. And the kind of hard that just keeps getting harder. Like a video game that you just don’t have the skill to really execute and suddenly you find yourself Googling and YouTubing ways to beat the hardest level of your existence. It’s like that. And the Game Boss is just not to be beat. Keeps stomping me down. And that is just, like, a lot. 

My something new has been my lovely church community. It’s a smaller church than we experienced before and initially this caused me some anxiety. Like if there are only forty of us here for most events, then the other thirty nine are gonna notice if I’m phoning it in. (There are more than forty, I’m just tired and this was the simplest way to explain it.) 

Today I chatted with a dear woman who has kindness in her very soul. It oozed from her, the deep and pure love of the Holy God we both believe in and love. Some of us do so rather imperfectly, most of us I guess. Ultimately I know that He is with me in the hard, in the something blue. Just as He is with me in the healing, in the something new. I don’t suppose it is ever ‘easy’ to be in love with a holy and wild God. 








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